Lab Notebook

Short poem. Fifteen minute break. What do I talk about
The girls at the table next to me are talking about eyebrows
Someone behind me is talking about how it’s hot, gloomy, sticky
I can feel it too all around me, surrounding
They’re talking about the thickness of their eyebrow hairs now and about their boyfriends and what they think about pepper
I’m always thinking about
how
the clouds are like pepper for the sky and I wish I was there and how I want to go watch fireworks and hold someone’s hand and how I lost the pigment on my left arm when for no reason my freckles all faded
and
how jaded I am when I want to walk into the past and live in my mistakes because I miss their laughter, being close to them, feeling the callouses on their hands and the strength in their arms
I think about how I always think about those things, how music makes my heart dance with memories aching to be heard and felt again, that ache when I feel them again. But they come with the sweet hope of a future promise, with the fear they will never come true, with a desperate plea that impossibility is just a kiss away
I am always thinking these things
Is everyone else thinking those things too but just talking about eyebrows

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